2. “You wanna know what money sounds like? Go to a trading floor on Wall Street.” – Jordan Belfort

3. “You know, just—people say sh*t. I don’t even know. I don’t even listen to it half the time.” – Jordan Belfort

4. “Still, give them to me young, hungry, and stupid. And in no time, I will make them rich.” – Jordan Belfort

5. “The only thing standing between you and your goal is the b*llsh*t story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.” – Jordan Belfort

6. “Let me tell you something. There’s no nobility in poverty. I’ve been a rich man and I’ve been a poor man. And I choose rich every f*ck*ng time.” – Jordan Belfort

7. “This right here is the land of opportunity. This is America. This is my home! The show goes on! They’re gonna need to send in the National Guard to take me out, ‘cause I ain’t going nowhere!” – Jordan Belfort

8. “I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich!” – Jordan Belfort

9. “I’ve got the guts to die. What I want to know is, have you got the guts to live?” – Jordan Belfort

10. “When you live your life by poor standards, you inflict damage on everyone who crosses your path, especially those you love.” – Jordan Belfort

11. “Let me give you a little legal advice: shut the f*ck up!” – Patrick Denham

12. “You can watch me, mock me, try to block me but you cannot stop me.” – Jordan Belfort

13. “Hard work beats talent. Every time!” – Jordan Belfort

14. “Risk is what keeps us young.” – Aunt Emma

15. “Fall in love with the person who enjoys your madness, not an idiot who forces you to be normal.” – Jordan Belfort

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16. “The name of the game, moving the money from the client’s pocket to your pocket.” – Mark Hanna

17. “Always keep the client on the Ferris wheel.” – Mark Hanna

18. “I don’t think you’re cut out for this job. You look like a kid, and Wall Street’s no place for kids. It’s a place for killers. A place for mercenaries. So, in that sense you’re lucky I’m not the one who does the hiring around here.” – Jordan Belfort

19. “Nobody knows if a stock’s going up, down or f*ck*ng sideways, least of all stockbrokers. But we have to pretend we know.” – Mark Hanna

20. “Ninety-seven percent of the people who quit too soon are employed by the three percent who didn’t.” – Jordan Belfort

21. “I will not die sober!” – Jordan Belfort

22. “There were certain things that you just didn’t joke about; it was simply bad luck. It was like pissing in the fate god’s eye. If you did it long enough, he was certain to piss right back at you. And his urine stream was like a f*ck*ng fire hose.” – Jordan Belfort

23. “Yeah, like Buddhists. They don’t give a sh*t about money. They’re wrapped in sheets. They’re not buying sh*t.” – Alden Kupferberg

24. “Every person around here, they want to get rich and they want to get rich quickly. They all want something for nothing.” – Jordan Belfort

25. “I’ll tell you what, I’m never eating at Benihana again. I don’t care whose birthday it is.” – Donnie Azoff

26. “If anyone here thinks I’m superficial or materialistic, go get a job at f*ck*ng Mcdonald’s, ‘cause that’s where you f*ck*ng belong!” – Jordan Belfort

27. “You be ferocious, you be relentless, you be telephone f*ck*ng terrorists.” – Jordan Belfort

28. “I can’t imagine ever not enjoying getting f*ck*d up. How’s being sober?” – Donnie Azoff

29. “Rule number one: f*ck what they think.” – Jordan Belfort

30. “My , who won’t take a no for an answer, who won’t hang up the phone till their client either buys—or f*ck*ng dies.” – Jordan Belfort

31. “It was obscene in the real world. But, who the f*ck wanted to live there?” – Jordan Belfort

32. “For your information boys, Danielle has promised to use this $10,000 for breast implants. She’s already got C-cups, but now she wants f*ck*n’ double d’s!” – Jordan Belfort

33. “On new issue day?! On c*ck sucking mother f*ck*ng new issue day?! This is what you do.” – Donnie Azoff

34. “I couldn’t believe how these guys talked to each other! I was hooked in seconds. It was like mainlining adrenaline.” – Jordan Belfort

35. “So, if you’ve got a client who bought stock at 8 and now it’s at 16 and he’s all f*ck*ng happy, he wants to cash in and liquidate, take his f*ck*ng money and run home, you don’t let him do that—’cause that would make it real.” – Mark Hanna

36. “Sell me this pen.” – Jordan Belfort

37. “The real question is this: was all this legal? Absolutely f*ck*ng not. But we were making more money than we knew what to do with.” – Jordan Belfort

38. “Most of the Wall Street j*ck*ss*s I bust are douchebags, just like their fathers before them and their fathers before them. But you—you, Jordan, got this way all on your own.” – Patrick Denham

39. “If I earn a million dollars a week and the average American earns a thousand dollars a week, then when I spend $20,000 on something it’s the equivalent of the average American spending $20,000 on something, right?” – Jordan Belfort

40. “Just like that I made two grand, the other guys looked at me like I just discovered fire.” – Jordan Belfort

41. “One thing I can promise you is that I never ask my clients to judge me on my winners, I ask them to judge me on my losers because I have so few.” – Jordan Belfort

42. “It was as if I was bulletproof or something. How many times had I cheated death?” – Jordan Belfort

43. “I’m not ashamed to admit it: my first time in prison, I was terrified. For a moment, I had forgotten I lived in a world where everything was for sale.” – Jordan Belfort

44. “After all, it was the nature of 20th-century capitalism that everyone should scam everyone, and he who scammed the most ultimately won the game. On that basis, I was the undefeated world champ.” – Jordan Belfort

45. “My name is Jordan Belfort. The year I turned 26, I made 49 million dollars, which really pissed me off because it was 3 shy of a million a week.” – Jordan Belfort

46. “Money is the oxygen of capitalism and I wanna breathe more than any man alive.” – Jordan Belfort

47. “There are two keys to success in the broker business—first of all you gotta stay relaxed, secondly you gotta always get stay high.” – Mark Hanna

48. “Get us two Absolut martinis. You know how I like ‘em, straight up. In seven-and-a-half minutes, you will bring us two more, then two more every five minutes after that, until one of us passes the f*ck out.” – Mark Hanna

49. “You show me a pay stub for $72,000, I quit my job right now and work for you.” – Donnie Azoff

50. “All right, pump those numbers up, those are rookie numbers in this racket. I myself, I jerk off at least—twice a day.” – Mark Hanna

51. “On a daily basis, I consume enough drugs to sedate Manhattan, Long Island, and Queens for a month.” – Jordan Belfort

52. “With this script, I’ll teach each and every one of you to be the best.” – Jordan Belfort

53. “Fugayzi, fugazi. It’s a whazy. It’s a woozie. It’s fairy dust. it doesn’t exist. It’s never landed. It is no matter. It’s not on the elemental chart. It’s not f*ck*ng real.” – Mark Hanna

54. “It’s his first day on Wall Street. Give him time.” – Mark Hanna

55. “Jesus Christ, I think you have a f*ck*n’ drug problem.” – Donnie Azoff

56. “There is no such thing as bad publicity. Your hair looks good.” – Teresa Petrillo

57. “They’re up my *ss. Don’t worry about it, I got it.” – Donnie Azoff

58. “You got my money taped to your t*ts, honey. Technically, you do work for me.” – Donnie Azoff

59. “What kind of hooker takes credit cards?” – Max Belfort

60. “I hate that f*ck*n’ dog.” – Donnie Azoff

61. “The nice thing about being rescued by Italians is that they feed you, make you drink red wine, then you get to dance.” – Jordan Belfort

62. “I felt horrible. Three days later, I filed for a divorce and moved Naomi into the apartment.” – Jordan Belfort

63. “There was this one time I was selling pot to this Amish dude. You know those guys who got like the beard with, like, no mustache or some b*llsh*t? Well, he says that he only wants to make furniture.” – Alden Kupferberg

64. “Oh, no. No, Daddy doesn’t even get to touch Mommy for a very, very, very long time.” – Naomi Lapaglia

65. “Yeah, it’s getting old and decrepit. It’s startin’ to sh*t in the house again.” – Jordan Belfort

66. “If you sell $10,000 worth of this stock, I will personally give you a bl*wj*b for free—and I hope it happens.” – Dwayne

67. “But, you drink enough and—you drink a lot and it’ll get you f*ck*d up?” – Donnie Azoff

68. “At least as a rich man when I have to face my problems I show up at the back of a limo wearing a $2,000 suit and a $40,000 gold f*ck*ng watch.” – Jordan Belfort

69. “And you know what else, Daddy? Mommy is just sick and tired of wearing panties.” – Naomi Lapaglia

70. “I got a couple of mil’ comin’ in like a week. And when it gets in, I’ll give you a call and you come pick it up.” – Donnie Azoff

71. “But if you can make your clients money at the same time it’s advantageous to everyone, correct?” – Jordan Belfort

72. “Hey Paulie, what’s up? No, everything’s fine. Hey listen, I quit!” – Donnie Azoff

73. “I heard some stupid sh*t. I—I didn’t even want to bring it up. It’s just—stupid.” – Jordan Belfort

74. “If I’m not mistaking, you just tried to bribe a federal officer.” – Patrick Denham

75. “Oh, I’m good with water for now.” – Jordan Belfort

76. “Mr. Hanna, you’re able to do drugs during the day and then still function, still do your job?” – Jordan Belfort

77. “Pay close attention to people who don’t clap when you win.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

78. “When you do something, you might fail. But that’s not because you’re a failure. It’s because you have not learned enough. Do it differently each time. One day, you will do it right. Failure is your friend.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

79. “Successful people are 100% convinced that they are masters of their own destiny, they’re not creatures of circumstance, they create circumstance, if the circumstances around them suck they change them.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

80. “When the window of opportunity open, that’s when you work twice as hard.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

81. “I believe in total immersion, if you want to be rich, you have to program your mind to be rich.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

82. “Best way to sell something: don’t sell anything. Earn awareness, respect, and trust of those who might buy.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

83. “Winners use words that say ‘must’ and ‘will.’” – Jordan Belfort, Author

84. “It’s business. Leave your emotions at the door.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

85. “You have to unlearn all the thoughts that were making you poor and replace them with new thoughts—rich thoughts.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

86. “People don’t buy stock; it gets sold to them. Don’t ever forget that.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

87. “Work until your bank account looks like a phone number.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

88. “The easiest way to make money is to create something of such value that everybody wants and go out and give and create value, the money comes automatically.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

89. “If you give people a good enough ‘why’, they will always figure out the ‘how.’” – Jordan Belfort, Author

90. “Act as if! Act as if you’re a wealthy man, rich already, and then you’ll surely become rich. Act as if you have unmatched confidence and then people will surely have confidence in you. Act as if you have unmatched experience and then people will follow your advice. And act as if you are already a tremendous success, and as sure as I stand here today—you will become successful.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

91. “The Wolf strikes again!” – Jordan Belfort, Author

92. “When it’s all said and done, it’s the energy we send out into the universe that often comes back to us. That’s a universal law, love.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

93. “Yeah, that’s right; money is the greatest single problem-solver known to man.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

94. “Perhaps I should have run the other way right then and there, realizing that a guy like this might bring out the worst in me.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

95. “After all, guilt and remorse were worthless emotions, weren’t they? Well, I knew they weren’t; but I had no time for them. Forward motion—that was the key. Run as fast as you can and don’t look back.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

96. “Money is the tool, my child, not the mason; it can help you make acquaintances but not true friends; and it might buy you a life of leisure but not a life of peace.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

97. “Look at them; as much money as they make, every last one of them is broke! They spend every dime they have, trying to keep up with my lifestyle. But they can’t, because they don’t make enough.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

98. “You see, money doesn’t just buy you a better life, better food, better cars, better women, it makes you actually a better person. You can give generously to your church or political party of your choice.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

99. “I want you to back yourself into a corner. Give yourself no choice but to succeed. Let the consequences of failure become so dire and so unthinkable that you’ll have no choice but to do whatever it takes to succeed.” – Jordan Belfort, Author

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